WHEN THE SUBJECT IS RAPE

2 PARAGRAPHS 4 LIBERTY: #405

Recently my friends at Square One Publishers, who published my book Wearing the Robe: the Art and Responsibilities of Judging in Today’s Courts, asked if I would look at a new book they are about to publish and give them my thoughts. I agreed. The name of the new book is When the Subject Is Rape, and the author is Dr. Alan W. McEvoy, who is a social scientist. The thrust of the book is to provide guidance and counseling to the friends and families of rape victims, who are almost always female, so that they can help the victim – and not increase the harm! Honestly speaking, although everyone knows that rape is a vicious crime that often has many temporary and often lasting emotional and psychological consequences, I had never thought about what I would do if confronted with this situation. And, like so many other people who were interviewed for the book, my reaction would be that “I would want to help, but I have no idea what to do – or not to do.” So this is the only book I have ever heard of that addresses this critically important situation. And since none of us ever knows when we may be called upon to help a loved one, friend or even acquaintance who has been the victim of rape, all of us should be aware that this wonderful and practical book of guidance is available to us.

So what were some of the insights that I picked up from my review of this book which discusses the complexities of rape and the recovery process from it? Men who are close to the rape victim can have a great impact upon her recovery – whether it is positive or negative – depending upon what we say or do. (Talk about pressure?) So be a good listener! Do not ask “why” questions, because they can imply that you feel your confidant somehow encouraged or caused this harm to herself. How this trauma can influence her memory of what happened. How questions about whether this crime should be reported to the police or not can be addressed. These can be intensely serious and complicated because they will involve immediate medical examinations, telling enormously private details probably several times to various strangers, and potentially having to testify publicly about them in court. And, since most of the time there are no third-party witnesses, whether the district attorney will even choose to prosecute the alleged perpetrator. So how would the girl or woman feel if the DA chose not to prosecute, or if the prosecution did not result in a guilty verdict? What are the pros and cons of bringing a civil suit against the perpetrator, where the standard of proof is not as high? But the most important question that was answered for me is that the ultimate aim for recovery is that the girl or woman no longer considers herself to be a “Victim,” but instead sees herself as a “Survivor!” So please be aware of this new book because I view it as a major contribution to our society.

Question for the week: “How do you send a message in code in today’s world?” Answer: “Write in cursive.”

Judge Jim Gray (Ret.) Superior Court of Orange County, California 2012 Libertarian Candidate for Vice President

Please listen to our radio show entitled All Rise! The Libertarian Way with Judge Jim Gray as we discuss timely ssues and show how they will be addressed more beneficially by employing Libertarian values and approaches. The series has concluded, but you can still hear any edition On Demand at https://www.voiceamerica.com/show/3883. And, by the way, these 2 Paragraphs columns are now on my website at www.JudgeJImGray.com, Facebook and LinkedIn at judgejimgray, Twitter at judgejamesgray, and wordpress at judgejimgray.wordpress.com. Please visit these sites for past editions, and do your part to spread the word about the importance of Liberty. In addition, my new book with the same title as my radio show is now available at Amazon.com., as is my wife Grace’s and my new novel centered about School Choice entitled 2030 KIDS: We are the Rising Heroes of the Planet. Please read and discuss them with your friends, and send in a review.